There’s a reason the “main-character energy” trend has caught on—because deep down, so many of us are starving for permission to take up space, center our own experience, and live life with intentionality. But for those healing from heartbreak, trauma, or people-pleasing patterns, the idea of stepping into the spotlight of your own life can feel foreign—or even selfish.
Here’s the truth: prioritizing yourself is not selfish. It’s sacred.
It’s more than dressing the part or romanticizing your morning coffee (though we’re fans of both). Main-character energy is about embodying the belief that you matter. That your choices, emotions, dreams, and growth are worth honoring—not because someone else approves, but because you do.
It means:
Saying no without guilt.
Making choices that align with your peace.
Letting go of relationships that drain you.
Creating routines, rituals, and moments that are just for you.
Owning your story, even the messy parts.
After a breakup or during any major life transition, it’s easy to feel like a side character in someone else’s narrative. Maybe you’ve spent years pouring into others, shrinking yourself to fit inside someone else’s comfort zone.
Reclaiming main-character energy is a radical act of healing.
It tells your nervous system: You are safe with me. I’ve got us now. It teaches your heart that you can be your own anchor. It shifts your focus from what’s lost to what’s possible.
Here are a few ways to practice intentional self-prioritization:
Start seeing your current chapter as a turning point, not a failure. “This is where I learn to love myself deeper.” “This is the season I rise.” How you frame your journey shapes your reality.
Ask: Does this nourish me or drain me? When you choose peace consistently, you begin rewriting your life story—one that’s driven by self-respect, not obligation.
Morning walks, candlelit journaling, playlists that make you feel unstoppable—rituals aren’t about aesthetics. They’re about reminding your mind and body that you matter enough to be prioritized.
The main character doesn’t explain away their worth. Boundaries aren’t about pushing others away—they’re about keeping yourself close.
Not the one they left behind. Not the one they didn’t see. But the version of you that’s rooted, radiant, and whole. They aren’t your plot twist—you are.
This isn’t about ego. It’s about equity. You deserve to show up for yourself with the same energy you’ve spent showing up for others. Choosing to heal, grow, and glow is not a betrayal of anyone else—it’s a commitment to yourself.
So go ahead: romanticize your lunch. Speak kindly to your reflection. Take the long way home. Say no. Dance alone. Rest without apologizing. And above all, remember that honoring yourself doesn’t take away from others—it shows them what’s possible.
This is your story now.
And it’s just getting good.
We founded Split Happens with the idea of bringing together a community of those going through a divorce or relationship breakup. Our vision is to help our members create a whole and fulfilled life, on their own terms. Our team and community will support every step of your breakup journey!
